The Exorcism of Molly Hartley (2015)…A Straight Up Evil Sequel (and Not in a Good Way)

Sequels are always kinda touch and go, some are good, some are great, some, like this one, are the cinematic equivalent of eating week old fried chicken…nasty, unsatisfying and guaranteed to make you wish you’d never tried it in the first place. It’s not like The Haunting of Molly Hartley, arguably one of the very worst films of 2008, really needed … Keep Reading…

The Human Centipede 3: Final Sequence (2015)…Why Am I Watching This?

My first mistake of the evening, was finally giving in to my (inexplicable) urge to watch the third (and hopefully last) movie in the wildly popular Human Centipede series. My second mistake, was when I absentmindedly started munching on a Caramilk bar while I watched this unbelievably disgusting movie…consider this a PSA people, do NOT eat anything, especially chocolate while … Keep Reading…

Horror Quickie: The Pyramid (2014)

Sigh… You know what? Fuck this fucking movie! No I mean it, this movie sucks so much that I am now totally disillusioned. I may need to do something drastic here to get over this crap, like become a mad super villain and use my wicked powers to destroy every copy of this wretched flick…or just pretend it doesn’t exist … Keep Reading…

Gnome Alone (2015)…and the Race for the Worst Horror Movie of 2015 Begins!

There is something to be said about a movie that knows exactly how bad it is and just kinda goes with it. Like Leprechaun, Nuke ’em High, The Return of the Living Dead and other self aware cheese-fests that came before it, Gnome Alone is a pretty shitty movie, in fact, it is far far shittier than any of those … Keep Reading…

Deadgirl (2008) & Why Boys Shouldn’t Play With Dead Things

Sometimes, if one is fortunate enough, you stumble upon a movie that answers one of those ageless questions that all of mankind has asked at one point or another. In the movie Deadgirl, the question is “What would a duo of teen boys do with a living dead chick that they found tied to a gurney in an old, moldy, abandoned … Keep Reading…

Leprechaun: Origins (2014)…An Unnecessary Reboot That Really Has No Business Existing!

I love horror movies. Good, bad, old or new, most horror movies are just so fucking fun to sit through. They can be scary or funny or sometimes so cheesy bad they’re brilliant; at the very least most horror films have some redeeming qualities that make them enjoyable. As such, I’ve had a blast watching some really terrible movies because … Keep Reading…

Jinn (2014)…Seriously, Are You Trying to Piss Me Off?

“Once, in a time before time, God breathed life into the universe. And the light gave birth to Angels. And the earth gave birth to Man. And the fire gave birth to the Djinn, creatures condemned to dwell in the void between the worlds…Fear one thing in all there is… FEAR THE DJINN.” Damn that line was fucking cool. You … Keep Reading…

Grimm Love (2006)…Facts, Film and Eating People

Call me kooky, but I’ve got issues with the idea of being eaten; and I guess I always assumed that everyone else did too, but as it turns out, not so much… Based on actual events, Grimm Love (as in Brothers Grimm…as in German…yeah, it’s dumb) is the story of two very lonely, deeply disturbed men with very particular desires. … Keep Reading…

Mr. Tusk (2014) and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Movie.

What. The. Fuck? Let me begin by saying, in case the blog title left some doubts as to my feelings about this movie, that Tusk is bloody, fucking awful. Argh, no seriously argh. I have lost the will to communicate this movie was so bad. Holy crap, what the hell was every single person involved thinking? What was Kevin Smith … Keep Reading…

Martyrs (2008), An Exercise in Suffering…w/ some spoilers

Martyrs is not, by any stretch of the imagination, an easy viewing. In fact,  I would go as far as to say that most people should just straight up not watch this movie, like ever. But for the more sadistic among you, or for the terminally curious (such as myself), I realize no amount of warning will keep you away. Personally, … Keep Reading…

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